Your Dreams When You're Still 17

That's how I look like right now. I can almost swear I look a bit different. Smudged eye make-up?

You know I have been quite busy recently, even though it is Easter holiday right now, I have much to do. And I have been thinking a lot, about the future, etc. A few moments ago I was washing dishes, chatting with Listy as usual and I said "Damn this course, I don't even have a clear future, right now I'm not even sure what in the world I am studying and how this is useful. I'd take business where I know I'd actually have a more stable career."

Taking design course is really not about what you love doing anymore... It's about establishing a career. I don't know if that sentence even makes sense. I seem to have that habit of typing a wise-sounding sentence but have no idea what it means and when you decipher it, it really is just a stupid statement. So forgive me. :)

What I was really going at is how, after saying that (the quote in first paragraph) to Listy, I realised that I am still 17 years old. That number shocks me sometimes, I can't believe I'm still so bloody young! It doesn't seem to be that way, I don't feel like I'm one of those seventeen year old girls going out to the beach with her group of friends in the car drinking Big M then jumping off a cliff into the sea watching the sunset... okay, I was directly translating the Big M commercial there. But it's true! Is that how teenagers are supposed to be? Free? They seem so rid of any worries, like the world belongs to them.

Yes I will hit my head and remind myself it is only a commercial and of course they are trying to sell that lifestyle.

Oh man, remember those old days when your life revolves around nothing but your homework, friends, and boys. I mean, it's not much different yet as of right now, but I saw my old photos with my friends, and I couldn't help but feel warm and tingly inside. What sweet memories! We were all one, together, and now we are scattered all over the globe, trying to build our career. School is such a wonderful place, and now I understand why it is so important to send kids to a good school - it is the foundation of a child, the environment, people, study methods directly affect a child.

Boy I'm glad I went to Bina Bangsa School. Even though I still fail to comprehend the motive behind "Girls should always tie their hair and cannot leave any strand hanging out. Boys' hair must be short and cannot go below the top of the ear. Everyone must have black hair."

I mean... once you get out of school, who cares if you dye your hair...? In uni and in the workplace there are people who have coloured hair and it doesn't matter.

I guess Bina Bangsa was making sure the 'products' of their school graduates are prim, proper, studious. Typical Singaporean school...

Few days ago, I read a very good manga called Cat Street. And there was this quote I really liked:

Anyway, I should really get back to my project now. And I'm also very hungry. But before I go, I recently had this desire to live in Japan. I think it's been there since I was a child but my friends around me are suddenly raving about it... and I want to go too! I want to try living there for a few months with friends. I think it would be like a dream come true. I'm aiming for that now, but there are many other obstacles along the way. I need to get my studies done here first, and I don't even know where to establish a career. It's all very confusing to me but may we all stay strong... Ganbatte!